I almost forgot about MM. I was hesitant at responding to his text- What could he want after 6 months?!?!

“Oh hey! Yea- I remember… how are you?” I texted back.

“I’m good,” MM said, “Hey I know this is weird- but I remembered you played bass and I’m looking to get back into music, would you be interested in jamming sometime?”

Oh god.. another one of these. I get these random texts time to time from old online dates who are musicians that either want do a “jam” session, or interested in starting up a band. I’ve done it a few times- but it never works out. But at that time, I had been toying with the idea trying to do my own music after 10 years of playing in other people’s bands.

“Ok,” I texted “Let’s do something next week.”

Our first practice was in Manhattan and we jammed for an hour. I decided to pick up the guitar and practiced a simple solo. Surprisingly, it went well- so we decided to do it again two weeks after that. I never thought about MM in a romantic way and never ever thought he was interested in me until about a few months later.

Where: A random practice space in Red Hook, Brooklyn

MM and I, for shits and giggles, decided to answer a Craigslist ad posted by a guitarist who was looking for a bass player and a drummer. “It’ll be fun!,” I said, “It could go either way- awesome and we’ll have other people to jam with, or terrible- and we’ll have a great story to tell!!” MM looked skeptical. It turned out that the jam session was awful, so awful- that we both had a hard time keeping a straight face. As we left the space, MM offered to drive me home. We got in his car and burst into uncontrollable laughter. “Oh god!” I sputtered, “I can’t believe how awkward that was! I need a whiskey shot after that!” MM laughed and turned on the ignition, “It was horrendous! I think I need a drink too, and talk more shit…but I don’t want to drink and drive though. Hey, my house is along the way and I have booze, want to hang out there?” I thought for a minute. Hmm seems innocent enough, if he was going to murder me- he would have done it by now.

MM and I are sitting on his couch, drinking gin and tonics and listening to music. We’re having a pretty good time talking music and just about anything we can think of. We have surprisingly a lot in common musically. MM is laughing and teases, “Well…did you notice that JL couldn’t stop staring at you?” I take another sip of my drink, “What do you mean? Like my bass lines were so awful that he was looking at me in shock?” MM got up to mix himself another drink, “No, he was totally checking you out! I think he likes you..” I blushed, “Uhhhh… No, I’m pretty sure I had something on my face or something- like a booger maybe.. god!! I don’t even know..” I trailed off as he lightly put his hand on my back and went around my seat to sit back down.” Oh. My. Fucking. God. I suddenly noticed how cute MM was. He smiled and squinted his eyes. He has really nice eyes.. blue grey. MM turned toward me and said softly, “I think we make a good rhythm section, you looked really hot tonight, I like your leather pants.” We leaned forward slowly and kissed.

It turns out we really do have really good rhythm together. It turns out that he has stuck around. It also turns out that I really, really like him. BUT… it’s complicated.- We’re not meant to be together.

He’s what I needed at that time, and I didn’t expect it to get this far- But it has. He helped me get over someone- and I used to jokingly say I was looking for someone to break my arm so I’d forget the pain of a throbbing toothache. But MM might be a full body cast. I’m not sure what else I can break to get over this one.